In and Out of Love
Home | Chapter on Childhood (9 - 17) | Chapter on Becoming (18 -30) | Chapter on Becoming (30 - 40) | Chapter on Becoming Pt. Two | Chapter on Being a Mother | Between Man and Woman | Still Working it Out Between Man and Woman | The Man And Woman Thing...It Still Works | Lover, By Name Called | Lover, By Name Called II | Lover, By Name Called III | Lover, By Name Called IV | Lover, By Name Called V | In and Out of Love | Still Falling In and Out of Love | LOVE IS STILL FALLING | Romantic Love | Distance Loving | Kisses | Prayers | Friendships | More verse | Through Depression | Ending verse | FAVORITE THINGS ON TV
Autobiography of a Poet

So breaks a heart and so too commitment.

SOMETIMES WE MUST WAIT

 

In a world of confusion

I became lost.

A wanderer, a vagabond, a wayfarer.

From on unsettled moment to the next

I was a reluctant traveler.

A nomad whose home was distance,

And whose heart remained untouched.

Sometimes we must wait

 

Unsatisfied were my desires

Unfulfilled my longings.

Untouched my heart, except for a minor grazing.

Unappreciated the true me

Unacknowledged went my needs.

Unwanted groping in the dark with

Undesired results, which fell short of pleasure.

Sometimes we must wait.

 

Then one night as I quietly sat still

He came to me, sweetly, sweetly.

From out of my fantasies and dreams

He materialized and became real.

Just as I had always prayed for

He was made real, man of my heart

Love of my life.

Sometimes we must wait

 

God sent to me, the desire of my heart.

God answered a long ago spoken prayer.

God in his mercy and kindness

God granted me a second chance.

God gave me forgiveness of past weaknesses.

God, who protects, leads, knows our deepest longings.

God sent you to me, me to you, he gave us we.

 

Sometimes we must wait, on the Lord.

 

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

 

I AWOKE IN LOVE THIS MORNING 

I awoke in love this morning.

 

To the sunlight dancing,

Softly across his bare back.

 

As my breath catches in my throat;

And visions of the night past

Fly erotically through my mind.

 

I awoke wet this morning.

 

To the feel of his loving hands,

Continually traipsing my form.

 

As if, even in slumber;

He cant seem to get enough,

Of touching me here touching me there.

 

I awoke dazed this morning.

 

Having been set adrift the night before;

On a passion so grand.

 

That the heavens opened before me;

Receiving me within its bosom,

Creating for me a rebirth of constellations.

 

 

I awoke enflamed this morning.

 

His muscle-ridden body caught;

By the light of the new day.

 

As he gathers me close,

Brushing early morning kisses along

The side of my neck and down my breasts.

 

I awoke alone this morning.

Desolate and incomplete.

 

I awoke to tears this morning.

Drying on my cheeks.

 

I awoke from a dream this morning.

And it left me aching, yearning, and pining for love.

 

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

LOVE UNCERTAIN 

 

He surprises me,

With subtle, gentle pleasures.

He awakens me,

With kisses on my face.

He adores me,

For all the many reasons.

 

And I exalt in his devotion, while I pace.

 

He beckons me,

With looks of happy ever after.

He adores me,

With fevered longing and grace.

He promises me,

For to deny me isnt in his make-up.

 

And I exalt, in his devotion, while I pace.

 

He teases me,

With his long loving caresses.

He releases me,

And the culmination is exquisite, full of grace.

He devours me,

With deep thorough kisses of lips and tongue.

 

And I exalt in him as I pace.

 

He completes me,

With his earnest creativity.

He compliments me,

With our matched determination to finish the race.

He convulses upon me,

 Resplendent in his triumphant release.

 

And I exalt in his devotion, yet in uncertainty, I pace.

I AM NOT LOVING

 

I am not loving here today.

No softness, gentleness, nor heart.

 

I am not loving here today.

No caresses, no kisses, nor embrace.

 

I am not loving here today.

No purity, no charm, nor appeal.

 

I am not loving here today.

No dreams, no hopes, nor visions.

 

I am not loving you, today.

I am not loving me, today.

 

I am not.

 

############

Sonnet for a Rejected Heart
 
Could there truly be a more hurting pain,
Than the one you receive from careless words?
Putting out your desire's light, like fire in the rain.
Things expressed aloud, which you wish you'd never heard.
And to awaken in that moment of crippling hurt;
As he tells you honestly, that he'd rather not abide.
For this lover whom you hold above all others on earth,
Would rather have another placed at his side.
That love or desire can not be given, if it is not received.
And if there is no one there to catch passion's resound
We are left to watch our shattered heart atrophy and bleed.
Then fall ungently and lie broken on the ground.
     For rejection, even if not intended, still must be,
     That he would choose another, and discard me.